Having helped Matteo to create his inspiring goals in his first coaching session, when we next met, he was still excited and motivated about his Vision. He was focused on how his life and work were going to be radically different and even more successful, when he accomplished his outcomes.
He had been putting up with feeling frustrated and increasingly upset with himself for staying stuck and not doing anything about it. This is a common experience that clients share with me in their initial conversation with me.
Now, he was experiencing the powerful feeling of relief from finally doing something! He had taken action to enhance his strengths, get his mojo back and rectify the habits that were impeding his progress.
The enthusiasm and commitment were great however there was also some frustration too. There was limbic activity in his brain because he was feeling anxious and uncertain. He did not know yet exactly how he was going to make his Vision a reality.
Like many Brighter Thinking coaching clients, he was champing at the bit to get going. He had already started taking action. However, without a clear strategy, his energy was flowing in many disparate directions.
He needed to have a cohesive high-level plan. This would help to dampen down his brain’s limbic system and provide the certainty that the human brain craves. Without it, the brain will try and fill in the gaps. As a result, errors in the resulting thinking are highly likely.
This is what I supported him to decide in the second coaching session. What was the best and most efficient way for him to achieve his goals? Not my way or what has worked for another client or a colleague. The plan suited to Matteo’s brain. After all, if copying another person’s route to mastery was the best method, he would already have moved forward.
Following another person’s plan generally does not work. As no thinking or decision-making has occurred, nothing has altered in the brain. There will have been no new insights and resulting new neural connections.
Mitigate risk
Matteo felt relief and had more certainty having been guided through a creative way to formulating a high-level plan. He had thought through the optimal approach that worked for his brain and his motivation for achieving his outcomes. It was unique for him. Importantly, he had reflected on the necessary big markers on the journey and included some evaluation. This alleviated any worry about perfectionism: start and adjust accordingly when you have more information on what is working and what is not.
We made sure to plan in extra time and think about how any unforeseen obstacles or potential setbacks would be addressed. This is something that is not my default nature, as I am an optimist. A pessimistic outlook is not conducive to coaching…
This risk management is an element that can often be forgotten by everyone. It is exemplified by the military and drawn from my learning from coaching those in elite sport – and what I did not include when writing the draft for my first book, The Brighter Thinking Coach!
Your challenge for this month
As a takeaway, this month’s challenge is to think about your project plans or the things that you want to get done:
• Assess whether your ‘how’ is truly yours, or belongs to someone else.
• Factor in extra time – much more than you think you need.
• Evaluate periodically to check your strategy is effective
• Block the times in your calendar to reassure your brain that you “have the time” to complete and finish it.
You get what you focus on.