WHERE IS THE LOVE? how you can be hiding it from yourself

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“Apparently, my towels are not big enough!” The older, male server in the department store chuckled knowingly, as I flung the three potential and very large man-size bath sheets on to the counter. He helpfully advised me to purchase another towel, which amazingly, considering my super sleuthing within the coloured stacks of varying quality and price points, I had not previously stumbled upon. I had also eyed up a new fluffy, brightly coloured towel for me, however evidently not being a bath towel expert (!), I was not convinced that my current ones were fully worn out and needed to be replaced.

I pre-washed the aforementioned new towel ready for its first use (test!) and deciding that it had not returned to its brand new, extra fluffy condition, popped it into the tumble dryer. Huh? I rarely use this electricity guzzling non-environmentally friendly machine. What was I doing?

I immediately realised that I was treating this towel with far more care and reverance than I do my own. This was to ensure that it would be in the best condition and therefore the most comfortable for the body which it was going to dry. And this hopefully appreciative body was actually not going to be mine.

This example of how not treating yourself with the same amount of care and love as you do others illustrates how this can be reflected in the most innocuous areas of our life. It is not until we choose to become aware and examine our daily habits that this is mirrored back to us.

For instance, some well meaning and caring parents consistently give their children (and dogs!) better quality food (e.g. the prime cuts of meat) than they feed themselves. Whilst this is understandable, especially if finance is a factor, I am not sure of its merit. If we want to demonstrate the value of equality this is not the route to take.

So during this month of St. Valentine, may I encourage you to discover the little (and big) things that you do on a regular basis that you would not dream of allowing for others to experience. These may show up at home or with your peers at work. Expect to be surprised.

As a consequence, I invite you to think about how you can stop doing them and increase the love that you give to yourself by upgrading the particular thinking, feeling and behaviour. Plus, pay it forward and help someone else do this for them too.


…By the way, I did go back and buy a new bath towel for me! 😉